The Feminine Feminist
Being Feminine Does Not Contradict Being Feminist
Are you a woman who loves to wear makeup, dresses and heels? Do you love to feel pretty and feminine? If you are like me, then you do like those things which make you feel like the female you are. Those things plus your most likely virtues of being nurturing, empathetic and other caring qualities, probably just feel like second nature from before you can even remember. Some would say that all the above actions are taught by society. Others will argue that they are natural traits that we are born with. (MacKinnon & Fiala, 2017).
On the contrast, do you want to feel respected in the workplace, as a strong educated female who knows and can do just as much or more than your male counterparts? Are you a female athlete, such as a woman on the USA Women’s’ Soccer Team who has won more World Championships than the USA Men’s Soccer Team but was not paid or viewed as important (Spiggle, 2019)?
Even though feminism as the act of women being given the same rights as men is something that I fully support, I still like to look and act very feminine which I believe distinguishes me from being masculine and creates the attraction for an emotional and physical relationship with a male. However, since feminine traits may come across as being weak, sexual, or nurturing, my femininity could potentially hinder my being treated equally by men and society in the workplace, home or other social areas. As a female in a management position at a male dominated business, I often think about how to embrace and value both being feminine and a feminist while not feeling guilty about either one. This article will discuss the ethical issues, arguments and objections regarding feminism and how feminism does not contradict also being feminine.
First of all, why should we have to choose…between being feminine or feminist? Why can we not be both? I would like to and try to be both.
The main ethical theories surrounding feminism are referred to as feminist ethics and feminine ethics (also referred to as ethics of care) (MacKinnon & Fiala, 2017). Feminist ethics strive to ensure that women are given the same rights as men, such as equal pay for the same job, the ability to work jobs that have typically been considered “male dominated”, like firefighting, welding or soccer, or to be the breadwinner and let the husband stay at home with the kids and do the domestic chores. Feminism also wants to eliminate what many believe are societal norms causing women to go out of their way to feel beautiful, like having cosmetic surgery, developing eating disorders so they can be skinny like models, or performing in pornography so as to seem sexual to men (MacKinnon & Fiala, 2017).
However, a lot of women and men still like the act of women being very feminine, which seems like a normal attraction between the two sexes. Also, women often are considered the nurturers and caregivers in relationships and mostly viewed as the more empathetic listeners. These types of behaviors are part of the ethics of care theory that often cause arguments with feminists (MacKinnon & Fiala, 2017).
Can women be both feminine and feminist? I think that it is possible and should be embraced if one feels that is who they are as a person.
My position on how being feminist does not contradict being feminine centers around the following three main points:
- The definitions of feminism and femininity
- The reasons why feminism does not contradict being feminine
- The possibility for all females to be given the same rights as men but keep our feminine and masculine traits separate for attraction and relationship purposes
Let us first review the definitions of feminism and femininity. Feminism is the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes. It is also considered as the organized activity on behalf of women’s rights and interests. Femininity, in contrast, is defined as the quality or nature of the female sex. (Merriam-Webster, Incorporated, 2019).
There are several reasons why I do not believe that feminism contradicts being feminine. First, feminism is more about the rights and equal treatment of women. It is about empowerment and prevention of terrible things such as female genital mutilation, being sold into sex trafficking, receiving much lower pay than men to do the same job and many more very unfair acts that have went on the past and are still going on today.
Secondly, do you agree with me?
Not everyone will agree with me here and I believe the strongest objection to my position would be that not all females like to dress and act very feminine and do not want to feel protected by a man, therefore causing issues with females getting all equal rights. Some feel that not all women are naturally maternal or caring and that some men are better at those things (MacKinnon & Fiala, 2017). Others think that you should have manliness about you so that you are not considered dumb or ditzy. (Spectator | Australia, 2018)
My response to those who object is to look around and ask other women if they are completely happy being one or the other but not both. I feel that some of the traits of femininity, such as being an empathetic listener, can be very useful in the workplace, especially in careers such as human resources or social work.
In conclusion, while women are all about having equal rights as men and should have those rights, women also want that physical and emotional attachment to men, which often means we want and like to act feminine. In my opinion, one compliments the other in numerous ways. We just need to ensure that society is retrained on how both issues are viewed.
Why can we not be both…feminine and feminist?
References
MacKinnon, B., & Fiala, A. (2017). Ethics Theory and Contemporary Issues . Boston: Cengage Learning.
Merriam-Webster, Incorporated. (2019). Retrieved from https://www.merriam-webster.com
Spectator | Australia. (2018, February 21). Retrieved from https://www.spectator.com.au/2018/02/why-do-feminists-hate-femininity/
Spiggle, T. (2019, July 19). What The U.S. Women’s Soccer Controversy Says About Equal Pay. Retrieved from Forbes: //www.forbes.com/sites/tomspiggle/2019/07/19/what-the-u-s-womens-soccer-controversy-says-about-equal-pay/#305117456b50
